What's this EMDR therapy??
Listen up, you traumatized motherfuckers. You might have heard of EMDR therapy, aka Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy. It's not some woo-woo shit, it's a legit form of psychotherapy that can help you process traumatic events like a boss.
Here's the deal. When you go through some messed up shit, the memories can get stuck in your brain like a bad song. You know the feeling, when you can't stop thinking about that cringe-worthy moment from ten years ago that still haunts your dreams. Except this shit is way worse. You're constantly reliving the trauma like it's happening all over again.
That's where EMDR comes in. It uses bilateral stimulation to "unlock" those stuck memories and help you process them in a more adaptive way. Bilateral stimulation is just a fancy way of saying your therapist will get your eyes moving back and forth, or use taps or sounds to stimulate both sides of your brain. It's like a brain massage, but instead of feeling relaxed, you'll feel like a badass who can finally face their past.
The therapy itself has different phases, which sounds complicated but it's just like leveling up in a video game. First, you'll do some prep work with your therapist to build a good relationship and learn some coping mechanisms. Then you'll identify the specific trauma memories you want to target, and start the desensitization phase where you'll recall the trauma while doing the bilateral stimulation. It might feel like reliving the horror all over again, but trust me, it's worth it. After that, you'll move on to what we call the installation phase, where you'll integrate the new info you learned and reinforce positive thoughts and feelings.
Now, don't think EMDR is some cure-all magic pill. It's not for everyone, and your therapist will need to assess if it's the right fit for you. It's also not a substitute for other treatments, like medication or talk therapy. But it can be a powerful tool to help you overcome PTSD, anxiety, depression, and other issues. Plus, it's relatively short-term, so you'll be able to get back to living your best fuckin' life in no time.
So, there you have it. EMDR therapy might sound like some new age hippie crap, but it's actually a badass way to face your trauma head-on and come out stronger on the other side. You got this, you traumatized badass.
Benefits of Therapy
Going to therapy can be a beneficial experience for many people. But let's face it - it can also feel scary AF. There are so many negative stereotypes around mental health that can get in the way of getting the help we need. So why go to therapy? Therapy provides a safe and confidential space to talk about one's thoughts, feelings, and experiences. It can help individuals better understand themselves and their relationships with others, and can also provide support and guidance in dealing with difficult situations and challenges.
One of the main reasons to go to therapy is to address mental health concerns. Many people struggle with conditions such as depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and therapy can be an effective treatment for these conditions. A therapist can work with an individual to understand the underlying causes of their symptoms, and can help them develop strategies to manage and reduce those symptoms.
Another reason to go to therapy is to work through past traumas or negative experiences. Many people carry emotional baggage from their past that can affect their current relationships and mental well-being. A therapist can help an individual process and make sense of those experiences and can help them develop coping mechanisms to move forward.
Therapy can also be helpful for individuals who are struggling with relationship issues. A therapist can help individuals, couples, and families improve their communication and problem-solving skills, and can also help individuals work through issues such as trust, intimacy, and commitment.
Additionally, therapy can be beneficial for people who are going through major life changes, such as a divorce, the loss of a loved one, or a career change. A therapist can provide support and guidance during these difficult times, and can help individuals develop the skills they need to navigate the changes and move forward.
It's also important to mention that therapy is not only for people who have serious mental health issues or big problems, it can be a valuable tool for self-improvement and personal growth for anyone and everyone. A therapist can help individuals identify patterns of behavior or thought that may be holding them back and help them develop new strategies to achieve their goals.
Many people are hesitant to go to therapy because they are worried that they will be judged or that their problems are not serious enough to warrant therapy. However, therapy is a non-judgmental space, and a therapist will not dismiss or belittle someone's concerns. Additionally, seeking therapy is a sign of strength and courage, as it takes a lot of bravery to admit that one needs help and to take steps to improve one's mental health.
In conclusion, therapy can be a valuable tool for addressing mental health concerns, working through past traumas, improving relationships, and navigating major life changes. It can also be a useful tool for self-improvement and personal growth. If you're considering therapy, it's important to remember that therapy is not a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of strength and a willingness to work on oneself. So go ahead and book that first appointment. It's just fuckin' therapy!
Holiday Anxiety | How to Cope with the Holidays and the Anxiety That Comes with It
Holiday anxiety is a relatively common experience, though it is not always frequently discussed. There are so many reasons for folks to feel stressed at the end of the year, and let’s be honest – not everyone is necessarily looking forward to the end-of-year celebrations. For some people anxiety arises due to the expectations the season brings including financial worries, gift expectations, and increased tensions due to increased proximity to potentially problematic family members. For others, the holidays are hard because they are missing loved ones either due to distance or loss, or because relationships are complicated. Many people choose to simply suffer in silence or repress their anxiety, but that can evolve over time into a dislike towards the holiday season itself and even burn out!
One of the easiest ways to address feelings of anxiousness about the holiday season is to simply talk to those you trust about it, and explain your feelings directly. There is healing in simply naming the feelings we are experiencing and it is highly unlikely that you are the only one feeling a little bit of stress. Talking to trusted others helps to remind us that we aren’t alone and can help us to feel understood.
#2 Make a Plan!
If you are worried about what presents you should get your family and friends, and how they will feel about it, consider taking a few minutes to plan things out! You don't have to establish a very complicated plan, but start by examining how much you want to spend, and then prioritize the people in your life you want to get gifts for. Planning isn’t limited to gifts though! You can also make a plan to help you organize meal planning if you are planning to cook for friends & family this holiday season. Making a list can help with organization as well as making it easier to delegate!!
All healthy relationships have boundaries. Unfortunately, the holidays can sometimes be a time when it can be difficult to enforce boundaries with loved ones. When we set a boundary, we are prioritizing our comfort and needs over others and that can feel super scary if you’ve not practiced it before! Other folks are not mind readers and can’t be expected to know how you feel or what you need if you don’t tell them. Boundaries are concise, clear statements about what we want, need, and/or expect from others in their interactions with us. We can also express what we will do if those boundaries are not respected. It takes a lot of practice to get good at setting appropriate boundaries and enforcing them. (A great resource on boundaries is Nedra Tawwab and her book Set Boundaries, Find Peace and her associated workbook The Set Boundaries Workbook. I absolutely can’t recommend her enough).
#4 An Escape Plan
Preplan your exit strategy before you go to that holiday event or get-together. If you are going with a partner, friend, or others, discuss in advance how you will let each other know when you want to leave, and how you will exit the event together. Making up a code phrase to use in front of others to communicate your wish to leave might also be a handy way to express your intentions without drawing a lot of attention to yourself.
#5 Opt Out
Another important attribute that can induce stress and anxiety on the holidays is the general pressure of participation. You might feel obligated to participate but it's important to acknowledge that this obligation, no matter how real it feels, is not an actual requirement. You are completely within your rights to simply not participate in holiday celebrations! You can just say no!!
#6 Self Care
Additionally, be sure you're getting a sufficient amount of rest; while it's not uncommon to make a point to go to sleep earlier the night before an upcoming event, anxiety can make it hard to sleep. Equally important, but often understated, is the importance of retaining the healthy habits you've already established for yourself during the holiday season. It's easy to get caught up in all of the excitement of everything that is going on and needs to be prepared for! For that reason, it might be easy to lose track and slip up in maintaining daily routines. This is one of the most important times of year where the habits you've built up for yourself should help with managing your feelings of anxiety and feeling overwhelmed, so it can be particularly disastrous if you let things fall apart right now.
There is often a lot to do in a short amount of time around the holidays, so make sure to take breathers when you need them! Even five or ten minutes can be enough to clear your head, but if it gets too much - especially to the point of it causing anxiety - consider taking a couple hours or even the whole day off. There's thirty-one days in December; no harm in reserving a few for your peace of mind!